onsdag 12. juni 2013

I lay in tears in bed all night alone without you by my side

The past days I've woken up and eaten bread with ham and cheese whilst drinking a cup of tea. Preferably outside. And it's been lovely and peaceful, and it gives me a bit of time to think. I did the same today, except I sat inside and I read a fan fiction I started on yesterday. And it was completely peaceful, and I thought to myself that this is what I'll remember summer as next year. I'll remember silent mornings with tea. I was almost done with reading the fan fiction (two pages from being finished), when I heard this bang in the window. So I looked up, and what do I see? Not a shattered window or anything-- no, it was a bloody bird!! (it wasn't bloody, but I meant bloody as in the curse ala "bloody hell"). It was trying to get outside by flying out the window. Except the windows were all closed, and the bird didn't understand that, so it continued trying to fly through the window. And each time it didn't work, and I panicked. Because it was just continuing all the time, and I thought it would kill itself by trying, but it was probably so nervous and frightened, that this was it's only choice. So I ran upstairs to alarm my sister, and thank god for her- she came downstairs and suggested we'd use a blanket to capture it inside and let it free outside. I murmured "okay", because I was absolutely terrified. But then it flew across the living room and tried to fly out the other windows, which were also closed. So I figured I'd open the windows it previously tried getting out of, whilst my sister did whatever she did. I didn't really know what she was doing, because there were bird shit everywhere (by everywhere I mean on the floor, on the pillow, on the sofa, in the window-- everywhere). And I was so terrified, and scared of the prospect of having to lift a dead bird. I really strongly dislike dead animals. I've been to one bird funeral in my life. I think this is a rather rare thing to do, but in my childhood I've also buried a mouse, and maybe something more, but that's all I can remember. Someone had found a dead bird, so we went to this place we used to hang out, dug up some mold, and buried it. If I'm not completely imagining it, I think we had a moment of silence. Anyway-- the prospect of doing this- well, I really didn't want to do it. So my heart was thumping really hard, and I was nearly crying because I was so sure it would either die or attack my head in fright. But it did neither. At last my sister managed to chase it, so it went out one of the windows I'd opened. I was out of the living room then, because I was terrified. But once it was gone my sister announced "oh, it shat here too". And then she left me to do the cleaning, which was almost as terrifying as the whole situation. My mum just shrugged as I told her, and I was just about to go clean up the mess, when she stopped me. "Remember to wear gloves!". And I was like, thanks family. I've just been traumatized, nice to know you care. The thing about cleaning wasn't about the bird shit-- that was actually alright. But it was the feathers lying around in the living room. I think I'm going to have nightmares about birds for days now. Anyway, yesterday was lovely. The weather was nice, though I'd previously dreamed about rain pouring down. It's just that I figured since every time I've wanted to go to the park and have a BBQ, it's been cancelled. But it wasn't yesterday, and though we had a few minor difficulties, we did manage to set up the BBQ. We left due to the windy weather, and we went through Vigelandsparken to look at all the sculptures. I've not actually been to see the sculptures in years. I've only been in the park the last times I've been in Frognerparken. So it was nice to be a bit tourist-y and take pictures of the famous sculptures (and the kilo-gang). I also did a Vine of Kiwi, which I found genius, but my sister said it was stupid. Stupid sisters that kills your excitement. Speaking of Kiwi; she sent me a snap yesterday which said I had inspired her to get a library card. I answered something like "yay" and that I've had mine for ten years. Which, I realised is a bloody long time. I just really enjoy going through a library and look at all the books, and the smell of old books. As a nurse-student, I should probably be a bit more worried about the hygienic aspect, but to be honest; I don't give much shit about it. I'll always love the smell of old books, when there is a splotch of spilt coffee on one of the pages, when someone has folded the top of the side. It's nice to see that a book I love has been loved by someone else too. Speaking of books, when I was reading The Fault In Our Stars I got really confused. Because I caught myself in actually trying to swipe the page, like you do on your iPhone. And I just had a really big chuckle at myself, because wow, have I really spent that much time reading on my iPhone? Anyway, I usually spend a huge amount of time watching make-up tutorials on Youtube, and I don't see the point in it when I don't ever try one of the tutorials. I guess it's a bit like watching food programs on the telly just for the fun of it. I recently watched a video about skincare via The Pixiwoos. The Pixiwoos consist of Sam and Nic, who are sisters and both makeup artists. On their own channel they do makeup tutorials on Youtube. To the point-- they did a video about skincare with a professional, and it really drew me in. I think you all should watch it. She has these great points about skin care "you only get one face, so why mess with it?". And skincare I actually do care about very much. And I find it so interesting. I was on Vine the other week, and I'm following Lewis Watson (that singer I discovered via 8tracks, who has a Youtube channel), and he did a short bit of All I Want by Kodaline, and it made me fall in love with the song again. I've listened to it 210 times on iTunes, and it's number 7 of my 25 most played songs. It's the acoustic version though, because I find the main singers voice so incredibly pure and shattering. I love that. My sister is making pasta in awhile, and that makes me really happy, because I was thinking about pasta last night. I just really love pasta. Alright, have a lovely Wednesday! 

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